Saturday, January 31, 2009

Quiet Riot "Cum on Feel the Noize"

Quiet Riot. This was the first heavy metal song I remember liking. They were cool and they were loud. It’s so funny to look back at this video and think how freaking great I thought they were. The lyrics weren’t great, but they were repetitive. Don’t ask them any questions…because they don’t know why…they don’t know why…anymore. Turn up the mother jumpin volume and get a Quiet Riot going up in this bitch…

Friday, January 30, 2009

Bryan Adams "Heaven"

I used to overuse the phrase "I'm finding it hard to believe, we're in heaven" when things went horribly wrong. But, these days, whenever I say that, no one knows what I'm talking bout, Willis. Bryan Adams and I are friggin old...


Thursday, January 29, 2009

Tina Turner "Private Dancer"

This is one of those songs that I’d love to sing at Karaoke night. A 200 and plenty pound dude offering to dance for money. “All the men come in these places…you don't look at their faces and you don't ask their name" "Let me loosen up your collar...do you want to see me shimmy again?"


Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Midnight Star "Freak-A-Zoid"

“Freakazoid robots please report to the dance floor”. In sixth grade music class we could bring our own music to listen to on Fridays. A big chunk of our time that year was spent listening to Midnight Star’s “No Parking on the Dance Floor” album. This video is a fairly reasonable approximation of our dancing talent…nerdy white kids trying to get Freak-a-Zontal. They are Midnight Star…they’re gonna show you how to do it, yes they are…


Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Rockwell "Somebody's Watching Me"

This song is awesome. It has Michael Jackson singing background vocals for a one hit wonder. Every time I hear this song, I can’t wait for Rockwell to sing, “When I’m in the showAHH, I’m afraid to wash my HAY-UH, cause I might open my eyes and find someone standing there”. In college, I thought it would be funny to wait until my roommate TeaJay was washing his hair and step into the shower with him. I scared the living hell out of him when I tapped him on the “shoulder”. To this day, he and Rockwell wonder who’s watching them now…WHO? the IRS?

Monday, January 26, 2009

Marvin Gaye "Sexual Healing"

Marvin Gaye. I wasn’t allowed to listen to the radio until 1983. I still remember the road we were on when this song came on the radio in my dad’s 1978 Volvo. I was sure that it would be the end of me listening to popular music. And it got worse (at least in my mind) when it was immediately followed by the Rolling Stones “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction”. I couldn’t understand what Mick Jagger was saying, but it sounded to me like “I can’t get no sex with side show”, which is so true. Wait, what? That, of course, made no sense, but, wasn’t that the 80s? Sense is overrated. Let’s just enjoy some M. Gaye and call it a day. “I can’t hold it much longer…It’s getting stronger and stronger”…

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Lita Ford "Kiss Me Deadly"

Lita Ford…slightly prettier than John Bongiovi…slightly manlier than Bret Michaels. Not true. She may have worn John’s pants and had Bret’s hair (or vice versa), but she was all woman. I can’t think of any other blonde hot chicks that really rocked (besides the obvious David Lee Roth). I loved this song the first time I heard it. I still try to fit in the line “went to a party last Saturday night. I didn’t get laid. I got in a fight” into my everyday conversations.

I know you’ll like dancing with Lita…


Saturday, January 24, 2009

John Cougar "Jack and Diane"

Little diddy, bout Jack and Diane. Another song I loved. It had plenty of innuendo (or as my friend the Todd likes to say “in-your-endo”)…hands between knees…hot carls…back seat debutants…sucking on a chili dog…dirty sanchez. Okay I might have added one or more endos, but the song does a great job of capturing the innocence of young love/lust. Before we know it, we grow up…we can’t get that time back…hold on to 16 as long as you can…

Friday, January 23, 2009

Eric Carmen "Hungry Eyes"

I can’t quite place this memory, but somewhere in my life I remember singing, “Cause we’re the HUN-GRY GUYS”. Hungry guys, hungry eyes, when PSwayze’s involved does it really matter? I’ve been meaning to tell you, I’ve got this feeling that won’t subside…

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Corey Hart "Never Surrender"

Do not, under any circumstances, surrender...


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Belinda Carlisle "Heaven is a Place on Earth"

Baby I was afraid before (to admit I had a crush on Belinda Carlisle) I'm not afraid anymore!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Wall of Voodoo "Mexican Radio"

“I wish I was in Tijuana, eating barbequed Iguana”…

Monday, January 19, 2009

Timex Social Club "Rumors"

Is Tina loose? Is Michael gay? Damn those rumors. Thank God for Timex Social Club's movement to pass a bill to stop people from spreading these rumors around...and their reasonable conclusion that death should be the punishment for rumor passing...


Sunday, January 18, 2009

Bon Jovi "Livin' On a Prayer"

When I was a kid, the two contests that I thought were equal parts ridiculous and awesome were Frosted Flakes win 10,000 balls and MTV’s win John Bon Jovi’s childhood home. In picking my first Bon Jovi song, I really wanted to the ridiculously awesome “Edge of a Broken Heart”, which they did for the Disorderlies soundtrack. Slippery When Wet had just sold 25 million units, yet they did a song for the soundtrack of a Fat Boys' movie? I couldn’t find a good video of EOABH, so I had to settle for this little known record. The boys from Bon Jovi turned the story of a union worker and a Schizophrenic diner waitress (make up your mind...is it "It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not" or "We'll make it I swear") into a monster hit.

BON JOVI'S "LIVIN' ON A PRAYER"

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Adam Ant "Strip"

Adam Ant. I lived in Grand Rapids, Michigan in the early 80s. The big stars played Detroit or Chicago. But, Adam Ant came to me. I wasn’t lucky enough to see his show in the G.R., but my friend Jason’s sister was lucky…enough to catch the bandana that A. Ant threw into the crowd. “It’s at times like this, the great heaven knows that we wish we had not so many clothes”…

Friday, January 16, 2009

Men Without Hats "Pop Goes the World"

Johnnies, Jennies, babies with special skills, a few bubbles, an elvis-a-like, a memorable beat plus some non-sensical lyrics. Men Without Hats got the 80s hit formula. Whatever happened to the Duke of Earl?

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Culture Club "Karma Chameleon"

I don’t think there could have been such a thing as 80s music without Culture Club. Boy George said Karma Chameleon was about being true to who you are without worrying what other people will think of you. That message was lost on the 6th grade me. I remember driving in my friend Bret’s car listening to Karma Chameleon. There were a few of us in the backseat trying to think of names for our basketball teams. Bret’s mom was disappointed that we picked generic names like the 76ers or the Pistons. “Get creative”, she challenged us, “Why not ‘Culture Club?’” The simple answer: we weren’t man enough.

CULTURE CLUB'S "KARMA CHAMELEON"

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Shalamar "Dancing in the Sheets"

Shalamar sang the sexiest of all the tracks on the wildly successful “Footloose” album. You and me, we should be dancing in the sheets. That's hot, but not as hot as this video. Grab your coat and wave goodbye to your friends, you’re about to get within 6 degrees of Kevin’s bacon…

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Midnight Oil "Beds are Burning"

One of the problems I have with music today is that there aren’t nearly enough political songs about aborigines. Thank you Midnight Oil for helping make the 80s great.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Frankie Goes to Hollywood "Relax (Don't Do It)"

I was going to start this post as follows, “Dear Super Religious Teen Age Girls of the 80s who wore your “Frankie Says Relax” t-shirts thinking you were promoting abstinence, You weren't. Thank you, AJ”. But, in watching this video, I realized I was the one who was wrong…this song IS about abstinence…from heterosexual sex.

Brace yourself…Frankie is about to hit you (hit you) with his laser beam…

Friday, January 9, 2009

Taco "Puttin on the Ritz"

Taco. In high school I called the evening DJ of Kansas City’s pop music station on a regular basis. I identified myself by saying, “Could you play Puttin on the Ritz by Taco?” Valerie Knight never knew my name, but I’m sure she’d still remember me as the Taco fan. I miss her. I miss Taco. Mmmmm Tacos. What a talent…got to…DANCE!!! If you’re blue and you don’t know where to go to…go here…

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Crowded House "Don't Dream It's Over"

Who among us hasn't tried to catch the deluge in a paper cup?

Don't let them win...

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Duran Duran "Hungry Like the Wolf"

In 1983, at the age of 11, I discovered there was such a thing as popular music. Neil Diamond and John Denver may have been popular in my house, but Casey Kasem opened my eyes to the music everybody else liked. After a few months of listening to top 40 music, I was genuinely worried about the future of the industry. It seemed to my 5th grade mind, that there was already a song about everything. Thank God I was wrong. This blog will take a look back on the music that made up the soundtrack of my youth.

I’ll start with the first song I remember wanting to hear over and over…Duran Duran’s “Hungry Like the Wolf”. It didn’t really matter what the song was about. I just knew that it was cool. It's formula was can't-miss...It started with a laugh and ended with a woman moaning and in in the middle had plenty of…“Do-do do do do do do do do do do do do do do.”

In the same way that the wolf is hungry, so too am I hungry...